Waving the White Flag

wedding dress

Do you hear wedding bells? Well, of course you do. It’s summer season and so here comes the topic of …white.

I love white.

I have a white phone, white accessories…hey, I even wear white after Labor Day. It may be a fashion don’t to you, but a fashion-who-cares to me! I was brought to an article on Lover.ly titled: The Great Debate: Is It Ever OK to Wear White to a Wedding? And everyone was divided. My response? HECKS NO.

Those in defense of wearing white:

Loverly Editor, Alexia said, “Of course, it’s never OK to take away from the bride’s big day! But according to etiquette guru Emily Post, the traditional rules of a guest not wearing white (or black for that matter) no longer apply. Post says a guest may wear white to a wedding with caution. In my opinion, a guest shouldn’t wear any outfit that directly resembles the bride’s wedding gown…As long as a guest opts for a cream or nude-colored dress, it’s totally acceptable. It’s also important to keep fabric and cut in mind! Choose a white cotton dress rather than a silk, tulle, or lace dress. Go for a short, playful dress or pantsuit rather than an elegant floor-length gown. Make sure that your accessories don’t scream bridal either. Instead of a strand of pearls and a fascinator, wear a colorful necklace or shoes!” 
My response: Okay, Alexia. I see where you’re going with this. I agreed with everything up to where you said that a guest could wear a white cotton dress. To me, it doesn’t matter what fabric you wear, if you’re not the one in the wedding dress, then don’t wear white to a wedding… ever.
Loverly Editorial Director, Rachel argues, “While I don’t think you should wear white to a wedding (don’t you have anything else to wear?), you can probably get away with wearing a white dress with a colorful print on it. But definitely steer clear of any dress that’s all white or ivory or that looks decidedly bridal. (Ask yourself: would you wear this white getup to your own wedding shower? If yes, then it’s too bridal.)”
My response: Rachel, YES. There are several colors in the rainbow and colors between those colors. Why white? And about wearing a white dress with colorful print… that print better overtake the whole dress haha. White should be peeking.
Brenda from Facebook said, “I don’t see anything wrong with wearing white to a summer wedding. Everybody knows who the bride is!” 
My response: Let’s not even begin any smidget of confusion. Yes, yes. We know who the bride is but like, what if the caterer or photographer I don’t know…forgot? Embarassing right? I’m just one that thinks of multiple possibilities and I strictly believe that the person trying to wear white should recognize that she isn’t the one getting married that day. The white can w a i t.
Kathy says: “It all depends on the faith, culture, and traditions of the couple. If they’re old-fashioned, then no. With today’s brides, sometimes anything goes. So then, yes, white is okay!”
Jeni responded: “My bridesmaids wore white, it was stunning!” 
My response: True, Kathy. If you are the bride and deem it okay for guests to wear white, then by all means do what the bride requests. Regardless of how modern today is, guests, please don’t try to were white on your own terms. And, everyone! Take note that the keyword for Jeni is: “my”. What the bride wants, she gets. All in all, you only wear white with permission from the bride.
Those against wearing white:
Loverly Editor, Jess, proudly claims the name “captain of team no” and explains, “While some etiquette experts are changing their tune on this one, I say, don’t be that guest who shows up in white and gets the crowd talking (and chances upsetting the happy couple). Wearing white is often very special to brides who choose to follow the tradition, so just give them their chance to shine. After all, there are a lot of other colors out there…” 
CEO of Loverly, Kellee: “I say no! Unless the bride is wearing a colored gown.” 
My response: And here is where I disagree, Kellee. If the bride is wearing color, doesn’t mean you can be colorless.
Loverly Designer, Jaclyn argued: “It totally depends on the bride, but I’d never wear white to a wedding. The event is the most important day of the bride’s life and I’d never want to wear anything that could outshine or take away from their special day. Out of respect, I’d steer clear of anything that could upset them on their day.”
My response: Omg, Jaclyn…I love you. You get me. You truly do. It shows the utmost respect when you consider how important the day is to the bride when finding what to wear to their wedding.
I asked my best friend, Claire, what she would do if I wore white to her wedding. She promptly replied to my text with “Ban you from church and reception hall” and I honestly deem that a just punishment. Of course, that won’t happen because I’ll be the one in her wedding and all but still.
Here’s my final say. Wear white to my wedding and get white OUT.
 What do you think Adorners? Would you wear white to someone’s wedding? What would you do if someone wore white to your wedding?
Disclaimer: Photo from the movie “Bride Wars”
Featured image from Bridal Musings via Berta 
*Please don’t forget to vote Adorned in Armor in category 5: the “Best International Fashion Blog with IFB” in the 2014 Cosmopolitan Blog Awards!!!

21 thoughts on “Waving the White Flag

  1. easttrentonpoet says:

    “Ban you from church and reception hall” 
    LOL. I’m not much of a fashionista but I understand all points of view. This article can also be viewed from a spiritual perspective, where the bride of Christ (believers) have more authority over this world. Slightly vague similarities but it came to mind.

    In defense of not upstanding the bride by wearing white, there is a reason for the old tradition in church from members therein required to wear certain unified-colors. The tradition is meant to express believers being seperated from the rest of the world. Maybe there is a connection between that tradition & a guest(s) wearing white? I don’t know.

    Your article was very well written. Peace

    • tarahsaint says:

      Raul, I absolutely loved your point of view! Although the topic is lighthearted, I could definitely see how there could be a connection. That could be a whole other post! lol Thank you for your well thought out and spirit led response.

  2. queenbeady says:

    As a just been bride I would not have been happy. Like they say if the bride allows it then GREAT, but if not, it is NOT an open invitation to wear it. How awkward?!
    Rebecca xxx

    Ps. Congrats on your nomination!!!

  3. Tiffany says:

    I would never do it, even if it isn’t a faux pas anymore. i think maybe an off white, or a blue undertone could pass, but to be on the safe side, stick to vibrant colors! a guest can wear white any other day!

    tiffany / tiffanyeatworld

  4. Becca Ann (@anchorawaybecca) says:

    I’m not sure what I would do if someone wore white to my wedding; but I would definitely be upset that they did. I may ask them to leave or have someone else ask them to leave. There can be accents of white or creme but not full on white dress.

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