Knowing When to Give Up

hope

A few weeks ago, I was basically begging designers to allow me to come to their shows for NYFW. I didn’t get not one reply (maybe it’s because I forgot to send in my resume…whoops).

But anyway, I was desperate…I wanted to go so bad. I had vowed to myself that I was going but there was evidence everywhere that I would not be. Then guess what? I got the most random notification from a beautiful young lady I now consider my mentor; she asked me if I would like to cover some shows for her!!! I screamed. And I do not scream, guys. But that time? I so did.

Like…what? That was all God. I didn’t even have to do anything! She told me she loved my work ethic, my style and my blog and figured I would suit the job perfectly.

Knowing when to give up? The fact is…

You don’t.

Be relentless and passionate at completing your task as hand, even if it might not interest you.

I began this post on a sad note. I checked myself like, “Wait, why do I sound like this?!”

A week and few days ago, I submitted a quick “About Me” video for my Fundamentals to Video Production class. I mentioned about how my blog got shortlisted for Cosmopolitan UK “Best International Fashion Blog w/ Independent Fashion Bloggers”. He stopped the video and replayed the part twice and then asked, “What?” The class congratulated me and asked why I wasn’t boasting about it. My professor asked about who knew about me being shortlisted. I simply replied with “my friends, my readers, and my professor because I began the blog in her class.” He replied with, “So the University doesn’t know about this? When’s the event?” I told him that the Blog Awards was October 7th (it was two whole weeks away when I told him) and that I didn’t even think to tell the school because my blog is something outside of school and I simply didn’t even consider it. Then he said, “SO?! We love things like that! We would broadcast you everywhere! If you told us earlier, I’m sure they would’ve helped provide you with funds.”

Intrigued, I talked to him after class. I knew it was pretty last minute but I figured I could at least give it a try. And, guess what? They wanted to help! I talked to the dean department, I talked to presidents, I talked to advisors. I emailed everyone I had to and even went the extra mile to find out how much I would need to the penny!

Although many faculty were trying to assist, it wasn’t enough. They told me I would have to do a proposal for the Student Government Finance board for the rest of the money. So, I did. My close friends, Malissa and Tina, were up with me til 5 in the morning finding flights and hotels to London. We created Excel spreadsheets and I printed out the invitation and potential things I would have to spend money on.

This morning, I submitted the form. Turns out, although the application didn’t say I couldn’t apply for spontaneous funding as as an independent, I needed some very important signatures on behalf of a club. I’ve been running around all morning, tense. “Only with Your help”, I kept saying in my mind.

Then I remembered I was a part of my school’s new advertising and media club! Duh. I’m their web historian and official blogger. Now, I have about 30 minutes to meet with someone to get their signature and submit again so that the board would see me Wednesday for my proposal.

My stomach is churning. My mind is at track meet. My fingers, wringing.

“Only with Your help”.

You know, instead of sleeping in and devoting my whole day to homework yesterday, I went to church. What’s caraaazy is that the sermon was about this. The pastor preached about becoming “finishers, not just starters”. He preached about how our human efforts can only amount to so much. He preached that we can say we want to do this or that but it’s a whole lot of work to bring about completion. Instead of relying on yourself, you must realize that you’re not getting to where you want to be because your Compass isn’t even on your journey with you.

I’m in a situation where I have done all that I can and have to rely on God to do His part. It’s so hard because as humans, the easiest thing to do is to depend on ourselves. Sometimes…scratch that, all the time, it can do a great deal to speak life (meaning encouragement) to not just others but yourself. Yes, I said yourself!

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26 thoughts on “Knowing When to Give Up

  1. krupa says:

    Some times no matter how hard we try, things only happen in a particular way. Those things are just meant to be that way. But it all happens for good.

  2. Mish L. says:

    I’m glad you found God 🙂 I’m always fascinated what he is going to give me in life. I know sometimes it can be difficult to give up. But you just give up for the better, not for the worst.

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